I want to care more than I do
Daddy, help me to be more like you

Draw me close, Teach me what it means to love you with all my heart, mind and soul.
I desperately want you. Scratch that, need you. Both!!!!

I remember as a boy being told to lift my hands in church, I was afraid. What would people think, what did I think. I wondered if that was really uncool. The thought never crossed my mind that it might please God if I raised my hands in worship to him. I never thought about how much he would appreciate and value my surrender to him. I didn’t realize that surrender to him actually equates to trusting him. This means more now than it ever has.
As I was running down the road this morning on my way to get milk. I realized that over the past year God has overcome some of the fear of man in me that I have dealt with my whole life. I was buckling the brackets on my new backpack in order to keep it from bouncing around to much. The brackets run across my waist and chest and felt a little odd. Then the idea crossed my mind that this was really awkward and people might think I looked ridiculous. I paused for a moment. Daddy imediatley started speaking to me saying “There are two kinds of people that your afraid of right now and you have nothing to fear from either of them.” “There are self-righteous people who mock because they don’t understand who I am, who you are, who they are or who they are meant to be.” (I have been one of those in the past.) “Then there are people who long for the ability to do what you do but are to afraid to ask how.” (Coincidently I have been that person too). In fact I used to be completly afraid to run in public at all.
The self-righteous people would mock because they don’t have the fullness of joy or the measure of understanding that says You were fearfully and wonderfully made. Although secretly their heart longs to hear and know it. I must come to the conclusion that If I really love Daddy then I will adopt the desire to show them his love. He longs for them to know him and know who he made them to be. There is no need to fear these people. They just need to meet with Jesus and maybe I can present them with that opportunity.
The second kind of people are the, timid ones who stare out of wonder. They completely desire the freedom I have and the knowledge of who they are meant to be but are afraid to ask how to get it, I need to keep my eyes wide open and actively seek to show them Daddy’s love. I realized all this while pausing from my run. Then I took a breath, buckled the straps on my backpack and continued to run.
None of this is to say that I have completely conquered the fear of man. Sometimes I let fear overtake me but everyday Daddy shows me a little bit more of who he is, what he thinks of me and who I am. He wants to do this for you too. Maybe he can use my experience today to speak to you. May you always be growing into a deeper, closer relationship with your Daddy in heaven. Walk with him today!!

God break whatever needs to be broken in me and fill me with life giving wisdom. I submit my life to you, let purity and light always be my desire.

Man seems to create all these systems but Gods plan was so much better. He just wanted us to walk and have relationship with him and in doing so, things would be accomplished, there would be beauty and communion and overwhelming love.

Humanity has become so far removed from Gods plan that in order for anything to be accomplished or for any funcionality, rigid systems must be put in place, and sometimes they work well, however I believe we now only operate at a fraction of the potential God created us for.

Thoughts On Time

Time is a gift and a help but it has the potential to be disasterous. It’s our means of functioning because we have very little concept of eternity. Its grace for us who only see in part.

There is within time the potential to let it control us and in doing so walk outside of the gift and it can become a burden that a child of the king is not intended to bare.

Time is a gift and a tool for our benefit. It should be utilized and stewarded completely seperate from being an agent that would steal joy.

Lord continue to restore our relationship with you and let us walk according to your spirit and dwell in you.

Vanity: Stop looking at yourself and start looking at God and then you will start seeing others and yourself how God see’s you.

Frustration and prideful striving

These can lead to wrong attitudes and sin, for instance when striving in a prideful manor for excellence in a sport one can become arrogant and start thinking they are to good to lose. Excellence is a good thing to chase but not in order to bring glory to oneself. It must be chased to bring glory to the king, when pride enters frustration takes over and sin has an open platform to thrive upon. For me this doesn’t necessarily take place in sports it takes place in other things like music.

Martin Luther

God of mercy and love, lift up the weary, the beaten and the sick, bring to life the dead in Christ.

Okay so last week, There was this day built in perfection, I mean heaven sent this day to us as sign of Gods favor, It was gorgeous. Pure blue sky’s with white fluffy clouds, it was warm and there was a nice mild breeze. So this day that was built to perfection had me begging to be outside with some friends reading and having wonderful fun in the sun, but here’s the stinger. As soon as I got out there I recieved a phone call. It was Costa, one of the staff members here at Dibor, he was calling to ask a favor. Apparently there was somebody in need of a ride at the airport in syracuse and I needed to leave right away. My problem, I had no car. So I had to make about 10 phone calls to track one down and I was running out of time. This was quite stressfull in and of itself. Now these are not the only things that were stressing me out that day but I won’t recount the other things for the sake of the limited time I have to get this done tonight. Let’s just say it took me forever to find a vehicle and when I did get one I was already an hour late on my way to pick up a complete stranger.

As I’m driving in the car, frustrated an down because I couldn’t enjoy the beautiful day with my friends, Daddy started to convict me, he said “Look at the past year of Dibor, look at everything you’ve gained.” and so I listed things off. I said “Daddy I’ve gained discipline, I’ve gained adventure, I’ve been challenged beyond what I ever thought I could handle and come out on top and most of all I’ve gained an amazing Dibor family.” I thought wow Daddys been so good to me, what do I have to worry or complain about. Then it was time to apologize to Daddy and thank him for his blessing.

Two minutes later I get a call from Paster Christopher telling me he was much closer to the airport than me. I got to turn around and then go hang out with my friends. I was a pretty blessed and happy camper.

So I’m thinking Daddy uses adversity a lot of the time to confront and challenge us and to make us a little more thankful. He gives us so many things and we can get annoyed, frustrated and downright ungrateful at the drop of a dime. The truth is we all deserve death. Do me a favor, look at your life and locate your blessing from the perspective that you deserve death bit God has insead loved you. I’m guessing your gonna realize that you really don’t have much of a reason to have a bad attitude today. Thank your Daddy for his gifts and let his peace and Joy invade your life.

Encourage somebody today even if it makes you feel uncomfortable. That’s it

The world tends to think mostly about how they can make their own life better.

The cross beckons us to give our lives up for another.

I should probably stop eavesdropping on other peoples conversations in the hotel dining room I’m sitting in.

Lord help us all be more like you!!